Sometimes as a parent I think you make choices that you at the time aren't really sure how they will actually work but you are confident you are making the right choice. Clear as mud? Back this time last year we were at the start of our 2ND semester of school and we had already chosen to at the end of that year pull our middle child out and bring him home to be home schooled. Short back story...He was being bullied at school and he was only in the 1st grade and nothing was being done about it. It was then as I emerged myself in research of curriculum, laws, and resources I realized as I prayed over what we were about to embark on that I realized I had a slew of other reasons why my heart was being called to this and almost none had anything to do with the bullying but rather what kind of children we wanted to raise. I have always been straight on this blog I am a lover of Jesus, He is my friend, He is the way the truth and the life, and my family chooses to serve Him! I realized I wanted my children at home during this very "touchy" time in their lives. I wanted to be the one who called the shots as to what they are actually subjected to. As I prayed I prayed that God would show me how to handle actually pulling our oldest child out of school also. I knew I might have a fight on my hands. But thanks to wonderful influence from some AWESOME home schooled kids whose parents share much of the same views as us her heart was also changed softened to the idea and SHE told me she wanted to be home too!
When we started this year there were many tears as attitudes, preconceived notions, and worldly desires stayed in the for front of our children's minds. I had days when I wanted to throw in the towel and days when I wondered what I had gotten myself into. All of those things have changed. I am really beginning to treasure this time with my children as God intended me to . I am so blessed by the fruit I see each morning as we snuggle on the couch for a read-a-loud or when I see one of my older children tying the shoes of their toddler brother. Attitudes theirs and mine have changed.
I just had to share what a difference time and commitment makes. I have watched my almost 8 year old son mature, change, grow in his hearts desire to help others as he shares Jesus' love, I have watched him go from tears over hours of homework to actually being proud of what he is doing and putting forth more effort. I have seen my daughter who seemed more self-centered open up making new friends, caring less about what others have to say, I watched her love for Jesus grow and I have been able to develop a much closer relationship with her. As a matter of fact this experience has helped grow much more positive relationships with me and all of my children, helped their relationships with their siblings and with all of us as a family unit.
Sometimes you just need fruit and I am so blessed by fruit...It gives me the courage to continue on and it seeds my decision letting me know I am doing just what God wants me to do for my family. I need that right now as we are going through some of the toughest times in our almost 11 year marriage and I feel so pulled to enter back into the work force. Thank you God for fruit and for opening my eyes to basking in this moment not to rushing through the tough to get to something better because when we do we miss the good in this storm!