Today as I was reading a post of another blog I read I couldn't help but wonder what it would be like if my mother was still around to be with her grandchildren. This blog I was reading was telling about how she has spent the last two week visiting either her parents or her in-laws and just yesterday her post was about her mother driving down for a visit and helping her with her little one while she ran errands. There was a small twinge of jealousy that ran over me (even though I don't personally know this person) as I was reading about how much the grandparents enjoy this child.
I know it was God's plan for my mother to leave this earth. I know her body is fully restored and she is watching down over us every single day. But I DO miss her and mostly for my children. Unfortunately I have not been blessed with the most attentive in-laws. Living only 45 minutes away it is like pulling teeth to get them to come and visit our children. And they are ALWAYS to busy to help on the babysitting front. All of this makes me a little sad that my boys and my niece and nephews never got to meet my mother. She was a WONDERFUL Nonnnie to Jesse and would have been the same to the others. I sometimes sit and wonder what it would be like if she was here...Would she just drop by to visit, stop in to let Michael and I have a date, or take the kids for a weekend just because? I am almost positive she would.
But for now I don't have this. I almost always depend on friends to watch my kids if I am going somewhere they can't, almost never does anyone attend their events/sport stuff, and more than once they have even missed a birthday party. Most of the time it is Michael and I plugging away at this all alone. I am so lucky to have found some friends who really love us and our kids. Because with out them I am almost sure I would be a pile of mush wishing for a little love and support!
I so understand the jealousy you're feeling. I get those same twinges myself; but, like you said, I figure I am in this position because this is how my life was meant to turn out.
ReplyDeleteI do, however, wish my mother was still here. I doubt she would have ever been the type of grandmother, or mother for that matter, that I wished she would have been; but, I would like for my girls to know her and see what a loving, generous and kind person she was.
Our friendship has been an amazing blessing to me and my family. Like you, I cannot depend upon my in-laws - especially my brother and sister-in-laws, but knowing you and Michael love us as if we were family is so comforting.